Tag Archives: italy

arrivederci italia

welcome back poopers, late sleepers, bored people of the world. I am sorry to everyone living through this time right now. it’s rough right now, but we will hopefully overcome this soon and correctly. stay safe, don’t wear gloves unless you’re gonna wash your hands every time you touch something. remember to sanitize everything you buy. remember to sanitize your phone too. don’t be touching your face after touching your phone if you haven’t sanitized it yet. sorry, tangent. 

I am here to talk about my least favorite part of the trip i took which was my last day in italy. I am also now sad writing about this because of everything that’s happened there. it’s such a beautiful place with so much culture. sending good thoughts to them because they’re going through hell. again, my bad, tangent.

we began by being the poster children of health and eating at mcdonalds for breakfast. I will say though, the mcdonalds in europe is poppin because they had vegetarian options way before they added impossible burgers here and such. 

our day was going to consist of going to the largo argentina cat sanctuary and finding cats there because that’s where according to google, they all congregate to be superior. we went here and not the vatican? well, we didn’t go to the vatican even though it was close to us because the lines to get in are ridiculous. it’s like waiting for some new disneyland ride. it’s rough out there, but I was told that if you do want to go to the vatican and avoid lines, you should book yourself a tour guide that will help you skip all that mess. 

on our way to the cat sanctuary, I stopped by a gift shop because it was our last day so I needed to buy last minute souvenirs. I found the most amazing tool that I should have brought with me to begin with. a portable fan. it was a game changer while we were walking around. we get to the area. it was cool, but I was interested in the cats that were nowhere to be found. we kept walking, but because of the heat, maria ended up with a headache so we found a nearby park with shade and she knocked out and I woke her up like 30 minutes later so we could go back to our cat search journey. 

it turns out the cat sanctuary we were looking for was where we ended up BUT there were stairs on the opposite sides of where we had arrived. we didn’t see the stairs that take you down so you can go inside and greet the felines of italy. fam, I was so sad I couldn’t take them home. if you know me, I fucking love cats. shoutout to my mifferino.

after spending time at the sanctuary, we decided to finally try pizza in the motherland. fam, that shit is life changing. it is quite the experience of the taste buds. the pizza is thin, so is the crust, they stick it in those wood fired ovens.  does and will not compare to the pizza we have here. chefs kiss. i don’t want to hear any italian pizza slander, if you try to compare american pizza and say it’s superior, that’s like telling me the tacos here are superior from the ones in mexico. gtfo. there’s a pizza place in San Francisco that really reminded me of the pizza I had there, it’s called flour and water so lets all go check it out in a gigantic group date to celebrate when this mess is over.

when we finished our pizza, we went back to our airbnb because it was time to pack. how sad. before i knew it, of course, i was hungry AGAIN. my friend carol had suggested a restaurant for me to check out while I was here, so I asked maria if she wanted to eat there as our final meal in italy. she agreed. i got caprese which is a miracle and i took a picture to show my mom because she knows i hate tomatoes. but not in italy. i loved it! however, the pasta I ordered was so disappointing lmfao. I am an uncultured swine because the man at the restaurant asked me why I didn’t like it and I said because i’m a fat american who loves salt, butter and cheese and that wasn’t salty, buttery, or cheesy enough. he was weird. maria said he was flirting with me but in a weird way. oh yeah, forgive my perveness, but the men of italy could get it.

Italia, ti amo. ci vediamo un giorno.

comment how, where and who you’re quarantined with

italia giorno 2

welcome back poopers, late sleepers, bored people of the world. 

buongiorno italia! this was the day we decided to go to the colosseum. not like, inside though because bitches be poor and also it was … okay, I checked and it says 94, but it felt so damn hot. usually, i’m not a fan of the heat, but it actually grew on me :|. 

what I noticed in italy, is that they use trip advisor more than they use yelp, but I guess I managed to find this breakfast place on yelp. i’m a 5 year old, so I think the main selling point was that this place was called Café MéMé maria says the juice there was bomb. I recommend it because it was affordable! 

we continued our journey and this is when we got on public transit. remember to use city mapper when you travel because it gives you the different routes you can take, which lines to take, and which times. it also tells you how much your trip will be. yes, I am a creep, I took a picture. it was just so damn clean! and it didn’t smell like pee or poop, all my bart riders know what that’s like. at some point the screen was playing a video from a runway show? lol

we got to the colosseum and we kept walking and couldn’t figure out where we were trying to go, finally we found this spot and were posers.

according to one of my friend’s who’s identity will remain a undisclosed, powerade was the official drink of france, but I couldn’t find that damn drink to save my life while we were there. this was the one time I desperately wanted powerade because of the heat. we finally found some inside the station, bless up. this is where maria and I split apart. the heat wasn’t treating her too well, but I wanted to explore. so I walked around wherever they had a bunch of shops. 

I started thinking about my mom’s best friend, who was like a second mom to me. may she rest in peace. as I was walking around here, pictured above, I started thinking about how whether or not she had also walked around these places because I remembered she had visited rome years ago when all of a sudden, a butterfly landed on my shoulder and followed me around for a while. I’m not sure if you guys have ever read or heard that butterflies are a sign that people who have passed are still living on. coincidence? i’m not sure. te extranamos mucho, socorro! 


after walking around a bunch of stores, the last store I went into had a really nice chick working so I asked her which place she recommended to eat at. she sent me to Il Pastaio di Roma. here’s a shitty pic of my pasta. the portions there are ridiculously small for the fat ass american like myself. because the chick from the store told me this portion was huge and she often had left overs for dinner. however, she didn’t lie about how cheap it was. it was about $5USD. CRAZY! 

I went back to the airbnb to see how maria was doing. she was doing better. she needed rest because the heat, lack of the official drink of france, water, poor diet, really adds up! who would have thought?!

pollo alla cacciatora

yet again, I found a list of restaurants to try in italy and asked maria if she wanted to go try it. she agreed. the name of this bomb ass place is trapizzino testaccio



caramel stuff with hazelnut stuff with more stuff.

have an eating problem because based on time stamps, from this place, we walked to another place to eat AGAIN. I think my excuse was that I wanted tiramisu and maria is a real one and agreed. that’s when I opened up trip advisor and found this place, La Botticella. on our walk to the restaurant we stopped for gelatto. La Botiticella had a line of people waiting to go in so after half an hour they finally seated us. it was really small inside, and I think someone was having an extramarital date next to us. i’ll never know. I said I was there for tiramisu, but I couldn’t help myself and we ordered pasta. bitch, I cried. that was the best tortellini i’ve had and probably will ever have. I can’t explain it. you have to go try it. the tiramisu was also everything I had hoped and more. I want to start crying right now because I miss the food so much.

with this I say goodnight to italy once again.

see you later for the last day in italy.

buona notte.

are you a tiramisu lover? what’s your favorite pasta?

viva l’Italia!

welcome back poopers, late sleepers, bored people of the world. 

we hopped out the plane in Italy with our dreams and our cardigans.

right off the bat, we flopped. yes we know spanish, no this is not Italian so as similar as the languages are, it’s impossible to get our points across without being fluent in Italian!!! or at least being semi familiar. our struggle began when we tried to catch an uber and it was $80 because as it turns out, I didn’t know that in Italy you can’t just use any type of car to drive uber. you know how here in the u. s of a people can use any type of car as long as it’s over the year 2008 or something along those lines? not there. they must drive luxury cars, etc. hence, why it ended up being an expensive uber ride had we accepted it. we decided to do the totally responsible thing and follow a random man in a suit into his van. it was the cheaper alternative and honestly he was super nice and didn’t end up kidnapping us, whoohoo. make sure that before you book a trip, you look into transportation from the airport to your destination. hotels offer that service, so, just make sure you look.

right off the bat, I was sus of Italy. I didn’t know whether or not if I liked the vibe. sort of the same thing that happened in amsterdam, but that changed once we arrived to our airbnb that we almost didn’t make it to because check in was 6 and we got there at 6:05  😬 luckily the guy was still there to check us in. out of the whole trip, this was the most beautiful, spacious and comfortable place we chose.


and of course, right as we got there, I started looking for food on yelp. we were about a 20 minute walk from a street that had a bunch of restaurants. I found this restaurant: https://www.ristorantearlu.it which was 5/5. I ordered a plate with cheese and salame, but what sold me here was when I ordered cheesecake. I 

love cheesecake. cheesecake is my favorite. cheesecake is my life. I FUCKING LOVE CHEESECAKE. i would slap you for cheesecake. 

comment your favorite dessert, are you a cheesecake lover or hater? when they brought me this though. I was like que chingados es esto???? no that is not poop. that is hazelnut praline, next to it strawberries, the cheesecake and on top of the cheesecake is passionfruit, I don’t remember what’s on the side. that cheesecake deserved the world, the moment I bit into it was in a whole other galaxy because it was so smooth so you were just scooping it into your mouth and it melted. I damn near cried. i’m pretty sure I teared up to be honest. 

after dinner we continued to explore and decided that we would walk to the trevi fountain because the weather was starting to cool down since it was about 9pm? on our walk, we had gelatto. I will never forget that gelatto place because the guy working called me poor and told me that perhaps I didn’t have money since my card was declined. but no, I had locked my card because I was in another country and I had forgotten to unlock it. a tip I have for y’all is to use a capital one card while you travel abroad because it doesn’t charge you foreign transaction fees that your debit card does. for example, I have chase so they charged me 3% on all my purchases. so remember to use a credit card OR go to your bank before your trip to get currency for the places you will be traveling to. avoid using your debit card and pulling out money from ATM’s in the place you’re traveling to.

sorry, I get sidetracked easily. we finally arrived at the fountain. also, another tip, keep your stuff very close to you. since this is a prime tourist spot, a lot of pit pocketing happens. someone dead ass opened the small pocket of my backpack. luckily I didn’t have anything in there. just be very mindful of your stuff, if you have no business taking a lot of stuff, do so. just keep the important stuff with you in a fanny pack.  there were a shit ton of people there so it was hard to get pictures, but we did it. we came, we saw, we conquered and decided to walk back. 

buonanotte italia. see you on thursday for the next part of this story!

comment your favorite dessert, are you a cheesecake lover or hater?